You are very involved with the pregnancy which makes sense because you are the one carrying the baby. But what about your husband. He is a part of the story too.
Do you want your husband more involved with your pregnancy, but your not sure how to include him? Or maybe he is unsure of what to do or how he can be more a part of the experience.
It’s been said,
“A mother becomes a mother when she is pregnant but a father becomes a father when his baby is born.” -unknown
I believe this is because the woman can feel the changes in her body, the symptoms that come with being pregnant, the fetal movements of the baby. The woman is doing things to keep the baby safe, like stopping activities that are potentially harmful, eating better, using safer products for personal care and household cleaning.
Now the man helped create this baby but he can’t feel all the things the woman can. He doesn’t have to change his lifestyle. Not much has changed for him yet up until the baby is born. Then life really does change for him.
To help him feel a part of the pregnancy experience, I have compiled a list of 51 ways to involve your husband with the pregnancy.
- Announce your pregnancy to your husband in a cute way he will never forget.
- Announce your pregnancy to your parents together.
- Schedule a “We Are Expecting” photo shoot. You can use these photos to announce to family and friends or on your social media.
- Tag your hubby in post when you make it Facebook official.
Plan and Get Prepared Together
- Schedule your doctors appointments with your husbands schedule in mind. He may want to go to all the appointments or he may be happy to just go to a few such as to hear the baby on the sonogram, and see the baby on the ultrasound the first and second time.
- Talk about finances and budgeting for the expenses of the pregnancy and the baby.
- Take a birthing class together.
- Take a newborn care class together.
- Babysit friend or family’s kids to get an idea of what it will be like having kids together.
- Sign up for child/infant CPR class together.
- Make a checklist together of things that need to get done before baby arrives.
- Pack hospital bags together.
- Make freezer meals together so when baby arrives cooking will be way easier.
- Create a birth plan together as a team.
Time Together and Encouragement
- Show affection to your husband, hold hands, hug, kiss. Make sure he knows you care for him.
- Make time to connect with each other and catch up.
- Go on weekly dates up until baby is born. After that it will be a bit more complicated.
- Affirm that your relationship is a priority and it will continue to be after the baby is born.
- Making love together is still important in the relationship despite possibly having a low sex drive.
- Encourage your husband to be open about feelings towards the pregnancy such as fears or excitement.
- Plan a baby moon.
- Go on a special shopping outing to buy something special for the baby, such as a baby book, blanket, stuffed animal.
- Be active together. Mama’s gotta stay fit to be ready for the labor and delivery. Go for walks, swim, workout. Of course check with your Doctor to make sure you are good to go.
- Create a DIY project for the baby’s nursery.
- Movie Night! Grab some popcorn and drinks, cuddle up on the couch and watch a course on breastfeeding, caring for a new born, managing labor and delivery or whatever you think will be helpful.
Give Him A Say
- Let him make some of the choices with decorating the nursery.
- Talk about traditions that your husband would like to pass on to the child.
- Invite your husband to register items for the baby registry.
- Let him choose the baby’s middle name.
Ask For His Help
- Ask him to rub belly butter over your growing belly.
- Ask him to massage sore areas on your body.
- Ask him to paint the nursery.
- Ask for help building the crib.
- Ask him to remind you to take your prenatal vitamins.
- Ask him to baby proof the house.
Getting Close to Baby
- Have your husband feel the baby kick.
- Use a stethoscope at home so you and your husband can hear the baby’s heart beat.
- For the really busy husband record the heartbeat and take pictures of the ultrasound to send to him so he can still experience it.
- Let him know when the baby is moving around and when you feel the baby kick.
- Go out for dinner together and celebrate the pregnancy.
- Guess the gender of the baby and then find out together at your baby’s second ultrasound.
- Write letters together to baby throughout the pregnancy.
- Have a countdown in the house so you can both get excited counting down the days till baby arrives.
- Encourage hubby to talk, sing or read to your baby bump, so the baby will start to be able to recognize his voice.
- Find a pregnancy app you think your husband might like for his phone.
- Make a game out of choosing the baby’s name.
- Get him a daddy to be gift.
- Invite him to the baby shower.
- Get maternity photo shoot done together. You have those to look back on and reminisce.
- Host a gender reveal party together.
- Go shopping for something that you can put baby’s footprint on.
I hope this helps your husband be able to get more involved. However make sure that you are suggesting and encouraging these ideas not forcing, guilt tripping or bossing him around.
This list should bring you closer together not create a divide. Try your best to be understanding and patient if your husband needs time to warm up to the idea of being a father.
What is something you appreciate large or small your husband has done for you during your pregnancy?